Lament
Merriam Webster Dictionary definition: intransitive v. to mourn aloud: wail transitive v. to express sorrow, mourning or regret
Lamenta - Latin for weeping or wailing
Have you ever been so paralyzed by anguish that you felt utterly alone? So gripped by sorrow that you’re certain no one on earth could possibly relate to the depth of your agony? If so, you know the power of lament.
I was introduced to lament in the four excruciating years my marriage unravelled. I had always tiptoed around the Book of Lamentations. Its very name sounded too heavy, too much of a downer. But certain Psalms consoled me in that desolate time and served as a healthy outlet of expression for the deep sorrow in my soul. Songwriter Brian Doerksen put Psalm 13 to music. I played it often and sobbed through every verse. Even today when I hear it, I’m ushered back to those dark days and feel the scar tissue around my heart and sense a heaviness in my chest.
After the tragic events of 2020 which churned up the troubled waters of racial injustice in the U.S., I was helped by a few Black writers who highlighted our collective need for lament; not only for the current events which headlined the evening news, but for the history of systemic mistreatment and oppression of people of colour. Honestly, it was hard to imagine their pain and even harder to own my part in it. It took time and effort, and I needed help to see my white privilege. I’m still working on it.
In the New Year’s sermon at my church, we were encouraged to lament the old year before embracing the new. I wish breaking in a new daytimer could put to bed the disappointments of last year but that’s wishful thinking. There is much to lament about 2020, personally and collectively. And just as I began to reflect on those disappointments, I was accosted by new reasons for lament - namely, the assault on the U.S. Capitol. The attempted insurrection knocked the wind out of me and doubled over, I could but faintly gasp, “Lord, have mercy. Christ, have mercy.”
Where are you when it comes to lament? Do you recognize a need for it? Can you allow yourself to look at what’s worth lamenting and direct your groans toward God? You might wonder, “what’s the point?” Getting in touch with your grief or sorrow takes courage. In bringing it to the Light, sometimes we find we’ve sinned and need to repent. Sometimes we see the sin of another and are called to forgive. Other times we simply call upon the grace of God and seek His tender mercy. God stands ready to give us what we need and be our Comforter, Healer, Deliverer and Redeemer.
You may find this process helpful:
Address God (turn your heart toward your Creator);
Complain to God (shake your fist if you need to; get real; speak your mind);
Affirm your trust in God (admit your belief and even your doubts);
Make your request (be clear; spell it out; what do you want from God);
Acknowledge that God hears and will respond (a mustard seed of faith counts);
Give God your praise (it will redirect your attention and lighten your spirit).
Writing down your lament helps identify the current at play beneath the surface of your conscience. Not only does naming it bring it to the Light but it enables you to see what you’re actually dealing with. Sitting with God in silence allows the Spirit to console you and inform you of how you are to be and the next steps to take. This requires time. It may feel risky or even foreign to you but it’s worth the time and effort.
Consider these prayers of lament:
Psalms 6, 10, 13, 42 and 130